From duck to swan

In retrospect, the ups and downs of life have no affect on the good and the bad. Yesterday my husband and I spent a relaxing evening with friends. We talked, watched football, drank cappuccino then tea, ate pizza all in front of a nice fireplace. There was a book on the coffee table about a women's journey through life.

It made me think of my own rugged journey and how many times I have initiated the process of writing about them only to lose all our data via the theft of our 5 computers (laptops and external hard drives included) last week on my way back from the apple store. Faced with this tragic occurrence we immediately used the moment or any recurrent painful memory of this loss as a opportunity to praise God the all knowing who provides and takes away as he sees fit. Not that He is to be blamed but that in every situation we find ourselves in, there is an opportunity to surrender our agenda and personal misfortune over to Him so that God may be glorified and continue to work out his kingdom in our lives. For a while I wondered what purpose was to be found in my previous life as I wandered away from Christianity. It wasn't Christ I feared or fled but the people attached to the religion. I was reminded in church last Sunday about the story of the prodigal son. Which of the two sons was more prepared to embrace his father's grace? It is easier for the self professed sinner to enter into a graceful union and grow in Christ then a self righteous Christian who has obeyed profusely all of God's laws.

Imperfection brings pain, which is a catalyst for change. In saying this I do not condone a life of sin. But sin is inherent in each of our lives and so as a human seeking a relationship with her God I humbly express a sincere desire to let go of any preconceived notions or any element of self contentment I may have and look forward to writing my thoughts of this wondrous journey of self abandonment to the divine. I might very well never turn these theoretical ramblings into a biography of how my vessel became broken. All I know is that God uses broken vessels. Next thing you know its 10 something pm and we are walking to our car in the cold weather heading back to our crowded condo.